Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize