HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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