i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
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