i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
