Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
well you can't waste a boner
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize