You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
