i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
