Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
There's always time for handjobs
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize