Im at strip club and am horny
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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