She announced her abortion via fbk
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
