Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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