everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize