Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize