is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
