white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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