Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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