seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
