Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
