no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
