come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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