Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(515): View more from Iowa

sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...

Fav 14 1439 3478
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(720): View more from Colorado

Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.

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(440): View more from Ohio

Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.

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(651): View more from Minnesota

Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea

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(773): View more from Illinois

i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo

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(817): View more from Texas

And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over

(817): View more from Texas

And hydrate too

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