Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
