I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
worst night to have a conscience
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
