grandma shit on top of the toilet
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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