You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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