quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
And then my night got REAL pukey
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
