plz talk dirty to me
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Naked Twister starts at high noon
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Randomize
