i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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