you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
