her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
