from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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