Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
