so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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