Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
