I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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