Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
