Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
