As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
