Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize