I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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