So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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