She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
