What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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