I like my sex mixed with concussions.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Randomize