We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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