and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize