Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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