Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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