I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize