So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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